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    Tales From A Nameless Cantina

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    LegendaryExGamer
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    Tales From A Nameless Cantina

    Post  LegendaryExGamer on February 2nd 2011, 07:11

    Our story begins in the setting of a Cantina. Its one of those kinds of places that nothing really spectacular ever happens. The same people and the same aliens are always there or on their way there. One common thread brings them together, the tales and media destortion surrounding the most infamous "terriorist" rebel group to have ever existed, Bad Karma.

    A gnarled old man sits at the bar, looks around the room, then glances outside the door at the symbol of Imperial power striding by in a quartet of troopers. Turning to no one in General he opens his mouth "Do you guys think the Rebel-er-New Republic will ever make it here to "liberate" us?"

    A sullustan plops down beside him "blablah, ugadiga, bloblobber, slobber, yugidia"

    The gnarled old man looks at the Sullustan and shakes his head, takes another pull off his drink, listens to him some more and then drinks some more, and repeats this process until he's thouroughly drunk.

    You see, he's appempting to jog his "Drunk Memory", and so he does after something like 16 pints of ale he's fluently conversing once again with the sullustan.

    Sullustan "...d Karma, just hit the news."

    Old Man "Did you say, Bad Karma? Salthor?"

    Salthor "Yes, I heard that they just resurfaced with a bunch of unknowns in hutt space."

    Old Man "Its been over two years since I heard any active mention of that name, who's in that group now? Alec Dumotte? Tengi? Raltir? Booger?"

    Salthor "No... None of those people. In fact, it only seems like Skeith and some other unknown girl is part of that group. Looks like Tengi showed up and then left with explosive review. Corwin's there but he's not been directly tied to the group, per se, he seems like he's just hanging around and waiting for them. No, no, he did show up with some panache though... He put a Proton Torpedo into an AT-ST"

    Old man "Who in the hell shoots an AT-ST with a proton torpedo!?!"

    An attractive woman leans over the counter form the other side of the bar "Corwin Amber does", she says lustfilly, "that boy is too cute, too tragic, all asshole, I'm in love with him"

    Old Man "Sandra, you only like the Nice guy/Assholes. Why don't you just find yourself an nice guy without the Arrogant Asshole qualities?"

    Sandra "You old bantha, he's not so much arrogant anymore. he's confident, although I think he may have always been confident. What fun is a man who has no edge to him?"

    Old Man "I don't have an edge and you love me... Why don't we go and solidify that love? eh?"

    Sandra Shudders at the thought "Its ovbious you don't have an edge, did you ever hear of something called personal hygene, shaving and using a refresher?"

    Old Man "Grumble, grumble"

    To be continued


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    Re: Tales From A Nameless Cantina

    Post  LegendaryExGamer on February 2nd 2011, 07:11

    Old Man "I don't see what's so special about this corwin guy to you Sandra. Back in the day I could do everything he could do"

    Sandra sigs rolling her eyes "Here he goes again... You going to pull that floating salt shaker trick again?"

    Old Man "Dammit! Girl, I was a Jedi and a damned good one too"

    Sandra looks him up and down "Then what in the hell happened to you?"

    Old Man "It was about the time of the Squib wars, when I was leading a band of young padafawns into a Sauce Temple"

    Sandra shakes her head "not again..."

    Old Man "....so we got to the Dark Sauce Master and I says 'Youre tim e is afff abnd endif yous Poopie head' and he lit up his lifesaver and attacked us. We were unperpared for the sherr quatity of his rageee. He cut down Jimmy, sarah and Joram before I got into the fray. Errr... I might has mabed a mistook.. It wers the clone wars I think" The alcohol is really starting to take its toll.

    Sandra "Go on, get it out, for the last time"

    The old man suddenly pushes off from the bar, leaping into the air he somersaults backward landing perfectly on his two feet. He struggles with his filthy robes for a while, produces what looks like the handlebar from a swoop and ignites a real lightsaber with a glowing yellow beam. Spinning with skill and grace, he deftly moves swinging the weapon in a pattern of skill, beauty and pure grace.

    Everyone in the bar is looking at him, stunned. "Itolds yuuoouuss " Then as suddenly as the display began, it was abruptly silenced with the sound of a loud CRACK. A hooded man stepped up, and punched the old man from behind in the side of his head and he dropped like a sack of potatos, the lightsaber sputtering and closing. The man moved with precision, he was hooded, one arm grabbed him and deposited the old man in a chair. Then bending over with that same arm, he picked up the lightgsaber and placed it in the old mans robes where it had been drawn from. The only thing anyone could see was the unknown assailant's skin was black like a soccorian's.

    The Unknown Man moves to and sits down at the bar. "Beer please" He produces a cred pouch with a visible brand of "BMF" on it.

    Sandra "Thank you, we don't really need to be drawing that kind of attention here, this one's on the house. As always, your timing's impeccable" Another quartet of Stormtroopers walked by just then.

    Unknown Man "Yo, I know *****, I'm a Bad Mother F@ck3r! The Knight there should know to keep things on the down low"

    Sandra "Mr. M, you know, that act dosen't suit you. I liked you a lot better when you were stern and more genuine. Cut The crap"

    Mr. M "Fine, I want a shot too. Don't worry, I'll get him home safely. Sover him up a bit and then we are going to have a little chat. Now, what's this I hear about Jedi Master Amber?"

    Sandra "Hey! I don't ever remember him running around and calling himself that"

    Mr. M "Well, the council... (uttering the name with some disgust) of politicians... or rather the New Jedi Councli has seen fit to appoint him as such. Thus he is a Master..." the words rolled off his tounge like venom

    Sandra " Maybe you should look at that Raltir fellow, he was calling himself a master for YEARS before he was appointed to the council as its head"

    Mr. M "Honey, don't get me started. yes, I have to agree with you. Amber seems like a better person than the head of the council. It defies my logic as to how Amber was trained with no formal master and yet he has a high level of mastery... hmm, perhaps there is some potential there"

    Sandra looking at him wierd "Are you trying to scare me? I've never heard you have an external monologue... You sound like the old man"

    Mr. M "Oops, I'm getting old, forgive me. I get tired of hiding sometimes."

    Sandra "Yeah, whatever, here's another beer, just keep the creds flowing, get the old man out of here and I won't say a thing"

    Mr. M "Oh, I KNOW YOU WON'T"

    Sandra "I KNOW I WON'T"

    Mr. M "Indeed"

    Sandra "Indeed"

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    Re: Tales From A Nameless Cantina

    Post  LegendaryExGamer on February 2nd 2011, 07:12

    Sandra "You know, things have been a little different around here lately. Guys, did't you notice things as a bit more chaotic?"

    In unison "BUUUUUUURRRRRRPPPPP!!!!"

    Sandra "Ok, maybe not... You're not the most erceptive bunch are you?"

    THUD ... One man's head hits the bar as he passes out.

    Sandra "Beebo, get this drunk off my bar."

    Beebo is a large droid that steps out from the shadows, humanoid in most respects, looks like a LE-VO Law Enforcement Droid. He grabs the drunk and with one rearward swing and minimal whining of servos tosses the guy unceremoniously through the entrance to land at the curb.

    Sandra "Honestly, guys, has anyone noticed a breakdown in authority here?"

    Salthor "blablah, ugadiga, bloblobber, slobber, yugidia"

    Sandra 'Salthor, you have a pirate footage news feed! Give it here!"

    Salthor "blablah, ugadiga, bloblobber, slobber, yugidia"

    Sandra "Without seeing it, I would have to say its only worth three drinks."

    Salthor "blablah, ugadiga, bloblobber, slobber, yugidia"

    Sandra "Thanks, " she spins around and drops the data disc into her holo player.

    The Holo Vid Comes to Life, its an interview Corwin Amber did by force at the News Center on Sullust

    Sandra "Oh Salthor, you are getting a free pass for the rest of the cycle!"

    Lots of random people "Holy ****! he just insulted the emperor!" ; "Even better, he just said he would see the emperor fall from power!" ; "That guy is insane, look its a FIREFIGHT in the News Studio!" "WOHA! He cut a hole in the side of the building, thred the chinks at the stormtroopers and jumped out the hole with some guy!"

    Sandra "More importantly, is the combat footage of the Victory One bombarding Ord Torgle's capital city, that's only a system over from here and we never heard about any of it..."


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    Re: Tales From A Nameless Cantina

    Post  LegendaryExGamer on February 2nd 2011, 07:12

    "Two Old Men"

    An Old Man with a nice shiner over one eye sits in a relatively drab room with an older black man across from him who is removing his robes

    Old Man "Windu, why the hell did you hit me? I was just..." The other Man cuts him off

    Windu "You know you cannot call me that anymore, we're all just folk around here."

    Old Man "Yeah, I'm getting a bit tired of all this hiding crap. Look, there's not much left of me to see. I'm old and sad and pathetic. We could do something you know." More a statement than a question

    Windu "O'Barric, the only reason why we ever escaped detection here is because you and I barely took out one of the Emperor's disiples quite by accident. Rather, he killed himself when we backed him off the ledge and he was impaled on, of all things, a rusty shopping cart... It's been almost 25 years and you for some reason decided to drop the act two weeks ago. The galaxy dosen't need us, we are dead."

    O'Barric "Master Yoda was still operating for a time and he was training Skywalker's Boy..."

    Windu "yeah, we all saw how well that turned out. he's dead now and One of the Emperor's hands is calling himself the Emperor."

    Obarric "Don't you remember what it was like" Fire returning to his eyes, the weary man no more than 45 years old lifts his head and there's a hint of youth showing

    Windu "you're out of your prime, you were never fully trained, padawan O'Barric. I remember all too well, we were arrogant and I lost my arm and damned near my life hurling out a window 200 stories to my death... My connection with the force was almost severed from the Emperor's assault and my efforts and strain in drawing on the force to keep myself alive. Yes, I remember, we are dead to the galaxy. Pray that they do not seek us to lead them down another mistaken "prophecy" crusade..."

    O'barric "Windu, there's something you need to see" He's looking wide eyed at the holo display. There's a Ghost there walking on screen in service of the "Emperor" with a legion of Dark Jedi at his sides..."

    Windu "No, Skywalkers...dead... No, CLONES!"

    Obarric "We should make contact with the Jedi Council, help them, if we can"

    Windu spits on his floor "No, not the council."

    O'barric "then who? The New Republic?"

    Windu "No, Amber"

    Obarric "I thought you said you didn't care for him..."

    Windu "Misdirection, he was the only self propclaimed Jedi Knight doing ANYTHING for the last 6-10 years. Only truly manifested skill about five years ago, then two later he had mastery over his abilities. He learned through some OTHER means, against all odds and did so at almost the same pace that vader's son did. Save for the fact that vader's son had two masters helping him, this guy had no one. He dosen't train nobodys, he's got an eye for cultivating talent and teaches patience and skill first, tempering the individual and tesing to see what choices they make before he truly teaches abilities in the force. He's careful and rarely if ever gives up his secrets. Has a student, that one, Sylar Topper and aspiring Jedi that is now a match for ANY Jedi Knight of old. We go to him"

    Obarric "Why not bring him to us?"

    Windu "Will never work, he's too busy being a paragon and a focal point for all that is good about the New Republic. We have to find him."

    Obarric "When do we leave?"

    Windu "We don't. You stay and make it look like I'm still here, no heroics."

    Obarric "But I ..."

    Windu "My friend, you will do more good than you know staying right here."

    There's another Imperial Broadcast:

    "Today we see the end of General Corwin Amber, he was destroyed on with his flagship above Bothwai. The New Republic's Fleet was entirely decimated by Death Squadron...." and the news cast trails off.

    Obarric "But what about the confirmed reports that Amber died in the Battle against Death Squadron? You see it there NOW!"

    Windu "Do you know of a man named Lord Aldaric Brandl? Also, you are aware of Imperial propaganda..."

    Obarric "Yes... He's a ghost, always shows up but has "died" on more than one occasion. What? Are you saying that this Corwin fellow has a flair for the dramatic?" Obarric questions "Yes, I know all about Imperial Misdirection..."

    Windu "No, all I am saying is that... If Aldaric can do it perhaps Corwin did as well. My friend, you know as well as I how we remained hidden all these years. There are methods for Corwin to do the same, if he has either figured that out or by happenstance been lucky."

    Obarric "If he's dead, then you of all people would be able to sense him... Master..."

    Windu "Enough." Mace is concentrating for what seems like an eternity... "I did, just now, at least I tried. I have no familiarity with him save what I know and have been able to review by looking into the past. He does not EXIST."

    Obarric "Then he is gone." he states bluntly

    Windu "Gone to be certain, but not dead. To obliterate a Force Spirit, well that would take a MASSIVE expenditure of power. He's alive and I'm going to find him. First stop Bothwai."

    Obarric "Good luck."

    Windu "I don't need luck, I have the Force."


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